Do you know why many adults today are suffering from low self esteem? It is because of their upbringing. This has affected their life choices in careers, marriage and even their faith, as they can be easily swayed away from the Godly life they were raised with to living a sinful life. Read on to learn helpful tips you can use to raise your little ones to be a Godly and confident individual.
1 Do not body-shame or insult your kids.
Don’t call your kids “dudu”, “blacky” ,”hummer head” ,”wowo”,”blockhead” ,”big-mouth” ,”lekpa”, “orobo-kiti”, “ugly child”, “Anya 4:30”, “hammer head of horror” “idiot” “fool” “goat” “slowpoke”etc. If you are doing these already please stop it ASAP. Ha! Many ladies who are bleaching today are doing so because their parents used to mockingly call them blacky. Were you the one that created your child?, did she create herself? so why are you insulting her. These types of insults will remain in the minds of your kids all through their lives. That your daughter that you constantly call wowo will at the age of 14 have a toaster that will call her beautiful. Do you know what she will do? she will leave your advice and run into his hands just because no one calls her beautiful at home. Even as a joke, never ridicle your kids and caution whoever tries to do that.
2. Always call them by sweet names
Always call your kids beautiful, miss world, mr handsome etc. Proclaim God’s blessings on them by calling them child of favour, child of grace, blessed child,prosperity is your name, love, apple of God’s eyes, ‘uwa-oma’, peaceful child, my joy, my firstfruit, future president get my phone from the room etc. You can even customize these names in your local dialect for your kids. Personally, i don’t call my kids endurance, perseverance and patience, biko don’t ask me why
3. Give them positive proclaimations to say daily.
Say these statements with your kids daily at the end of their morning prayers. You can spice it up by jumping, hitting your chests, or shouting hurray to make them gingered.
I am beautifully and wonderfully made (x3)
I can do all things through Christ that strenghtens me (x3)
I am blessed, I am favoured and I am a child of grace (x3)
I am strong, i am beautiful, I am great, I can do anything (x3)
My protector is awake. The protector of (INSERT NAME e.g ugo) never doses or sleep (x3)
4. Don’t flog or scold your kids excessively
Yes, the bible says spare the rod and spoil your child, but just as with all things, flogging or scolding your child excessively is very detrimental to their esteem. It leads to two things, either the child stops getting scared of been flogged or scolded or the child’s spirit gets broken. He becomes a dummy, has no say of his own. He won’t be able to speak out for his rights when been maltreated as an adult. On the either end, they can become narcisstic, beating up their spouses because they believe that is the only way to correct someone. Your kids are individuals with their own minds just like you. Learn to take them by your side and ask why they acted in a bad manner. Listen to their opinion and their point of view and correct accordingly. If you must spank use a cane and beat on their palms or buttocks. Please don’t use your hands,belt,pepper,iron to slap or inflict bodily marks on them.
5. Treat your kids equally
Always show your kids that you love them equally whether or not it is true. Not doing so can make them grow up feeling like they are not good enough. Don’t show one kid more love or buy better gifts than the rest. This act can breed sibling rivalry that will last even after you are gone.
6. Preach and practice Godly values with them
Teach your kids Godly values like love, peace, humility, forgiveness and how God hates envy, jealousy, lies etc. You can tell the first to forfeit his meat for the last, if he does without hesitation reward him with two meats. Tell the last to hug and forgive the elder sibling who spanked her. These values last for a lifetime. Remember to practice what you preach. You can’t be beating your wife and be teaching your kids about love.
Lastly, endeavor to pray for them always. It is only God that can perfect our efforts. Please post some cute names and useful tips others can learn from in this topic.